A silent affair...

In my head, you and i have been one
bound by the chains of love
we have been the happiest of prisoners alive
In my mind's eye
i have visualized every single detail
however sordid, however memorable
I've seen them all so clearly
we have redefined love,
and what it means to love
We've said the magic words
"till death do us part..."
we have lived a good life
not one without troubles
But every downfall we have overcome
for in my mind, you and i are one..
We have been happy,
we have been sad
we have laughed
tears too...we have known
We have fallen apart
we have reconciled
and further strengthened this our love
In my mind, i have found the one for me
In you, i have found the path that has led me to love
i have not fallen into it..
but gracefully sauntered into it
All this, in my mind
A silent affair
You and I have had
One that has been wonderful
yet you don't know my name
you don't even know i exist
But in my mind
you know every part of me
from my hair to the soles of my feet
You have understood me,
now i wonder....
if this silent affair can come to be true.

Painful Injection

I stare into oblivion, clueless
my rigid soul lacking an opinion..soul...less
a painful hollow that stands bare
with every side within me, pulling..wanting to tear

The power with which it holds, numbing me,
bringing my will to weaken, not letting me be.
i writh in anguish over it's clasping nature
which threatens to pull down my resilience..

The definition that is torment, ingrained into
every living part that stands with this body,
devastation as it seeks to leave ruin,
leaving me...still..unmoving...begging at it's mercy,
that being like staring into the horizon....
unreachable, unfarthomed but yet attainable

Yet through all this, blow after blow struck,
weakening what is any ray of hope,
that may peek, seeking redemption..a ray....
of light...maybe signifying that the battle is not lost,
but that...is not to be...in my head...maybe..
but i'm going crazy...

It's saddist nature laughing as my grip loosens
to any chance of survival, inhibition filling through my nerves
serving its tastes of pure raw piercing hurt..misery at its best..
my mobility halted as my enslaved nature slowly gives in...
trying to fight its last blows....

Yet all this in vain,
death of a soul unbecoming, the body...
giving in into its detention, a final bow out by what is....
the painful injection...